dysmorphics | it's you and me up against the world, it's you and me

Steph pursed her lips together as she thought about it. "I think the Google would have something about how it works." There were videos and how-to articles of practically everything, so it probably wasn't far off that there would be something for the inhaler. That way they wouldn't have to recreate it exactly. "Not sure what that would mean for the inventor though. You wouldn't wanna put him or her out of a job."

She took the inhaler back but left it sitting on the countertop, especially after Bucky told her about her stuff. "Really?" Her surprise was clear on her face. "You're not here to talk me into going back?"

There it was, the elephant in the room. While she suspected that probably wasn't the case anymore — who else would he be married to? — she was waiting for the opportunity to breach the subject and get some clarity. Look at what not talking and just assuming things had brought them. She was not making that mistake again.

"Guess you'll have to show me the Google, too, since I don't know what that is," Bucky said with a chuckle and a shrug. "Maybe I can find out who the inventor is and get Stark to hire him for his company or something. I don't know."

He took a couple steps across the room to grab the mug of hot chocolate, mostly just to do something with his hands. Sure, when Steph--the one he married--first told him she had dropped his best friend off in the future, Bucky's knee-jerk reaction had been wanting to bring her back. But the more she told him about how much more advanced medicine had gotten, and the fact that she was with a version of himself, not just on her own, made him think that maybe it was a good place for her.

More than anything, Bucky thought it should be her decision, though.

"Don't get me wrong," he began, looking back at her with a gentle smile. "The offer's there if you want it. You could come back with us and we'd figure things out. But you seem happy here. And healthy."

"I'll show you later," Steph promised. "It's so cool. You can play music on it too. And read books." She might be conflating the Internet and phone apps, but hey.

She picked up one of the glasses of water she prepared and took a drink as she waited for Bucky's answer. And while it wasn't an unequivocal no, she could read the intent behind it. How could she and any version of herself have mistaken Bucky's kindness and affection for something else? They really were so dumb.

"How's that gonna work with two of us?" She couldn't resist teasing, and the way she smiled behind her glass, well.

"Like I said, we'd figure something out," he said, teasing her just as much as she teased him. "She goes by Gracie in public these days, so people don't ask so many questions about how she got big. With one of you on each arm, the papers would havea field day."

Wouldn't that be something, though? Hey, Ma, I know you just got used to Steph being all big and strong now, but here's a second Steph that's the size you remember. Still classified stuff, of course. Might even give one of his parents a heart attack, sending them to an early grave.

Something about the way she was smiling behind that glass, though, made him think she wasn't really thinking about it. Which was good, considering what he heard and what he knew about himself? He figured the Bucky that was in the other room needed her.

Steph had done enough reading by now that she could take a guess at what would've been written about a Bucky who survived the war. "Look at you, all famous. How many marriage proposals did you get in the mail? Must be rough, having to choose from so many." She feigned innocence as she gestured to his hand, where his ring rested.

Before arriving in the future, that would've been a depressing thought. How could she hope to compete? She was nobody; hell, even after Cap got enhanced by the serum she still thought he wasn't interested in her. Steph knew better now though, and there was no undercurrent of sadness in her teasing. As crazy and dumb as it sounded, Bucky would choose her every time. She could bet on that.

She set her glass aside. "Buck, you're my best friend, and I'll always love you." It used to be so weird, to know two of them, to love two of them, but she'd already had enough time to get used to the idea. "But I'm with him, and I'm not going anywhere he isn't. I'm sorry."

Bucky looked down at his left hand, rubbing his thumb over the simple gold band there. "There wasn't really a choice, Steph," he said before looking back over at his friend. "It was gonna be Steph Rogers or no one." Sure, for a while there it had seemed like no one was going to win out, but that changed when he got on the ferris wheel one evening. Next thing he knew, he was married to his best friend.

"Good," he said as he set his mug down, then leaned back against the counter again. "She's told me enough about his past that if he's anything like me? I know he needs you." And how couldn't they be anything alike? Sure, there were bound to be differences because of how their lives changed, but they'd been the same exact person up until one point in the War. "Same goes for me, for the record. You're always gonna be my best friend, and I'm always gonna love you, but I go where she goes."

Chuckling a bit, he gestured towards the other room with a tilt of his head. "Besides, in case you haven't noticed? He's stronger than me. I don't wanna have to fight him."

"Yeah, you really don't wanna mess with him." Steph's smile was sad though, as she wasn't only referring to the older Bucky's more muscular physique, but to what happened to him after the war. He would never hurt her, that she wholeheartedly believed, but that didn't mean he wasn't dangerous.

She loved him though, and she was grateful than her best friend was respecting her choice. Slowly, she made her way over to him to give him a hug. "Thank you." It was really thoughtful of him to keep
and bring her stuff over, but she was also just relieved that this reunion didn't have to be a fight.

Then, while still in his arms, she looked up at him again with that sad smile. "Don't be too hard on her, okay? She... she's really had it rough." She'd gathered that while Cap had many friends, she dealt with her demons alone, and struggled immensely with it. "I dunno the details, but she thinks it was all her fault — what happened to you, HYDRA taking over SHIELD, half the universe dying and turning to ash. And she, well. She wanted to die." There were some very disturbing sketches in one of Cap's newer sketchpads, though what was probably truly disturbing was how much Steph understood what her counterpart had been trying to convey.

Bucky wrapped his arms around Steph in return, hugging her tightly as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head. Friendly, like he'd done a thousand times while they grew up. "There's nothing to thank me for," he said simply. And he meant it, too. Bucky didn't think he'd done anything particularly worth thanks, he just... did what he thought he should do. Brought her some things and understood it was time to let her go.

When he looked back down at her, he had his own sad smile on his face. "Yeah, she's told me some things. Hinted at others. I'll let her tell me things at her own pace; she knows I'm there for the long run." There was nothing his wife could tell him that would make him turn his back on her. "I mean, the war itself was bad enough, and that dumbass chose to go through it more than once." He sighed. "But I know why she did it."

Sighing, his arms tightened around Steph. She felt so very, very small in his arms after his time with the one he married. "One thing I gotta do, though," he said before lifting her in the hug, swinging her slightly as he held her close. He'd lifted her up for hugs tons of times in the past. "I can't do this with her, so I had to do it one more time."

Steph squeaked, then laughed even as tears sprung to her eyes. She'd said goodbye to Bucky before, sure. This time was different though. It wasn't just farewell, but also letting go, and it felt bittersweet. "Do it again," she said, sniffling. "I'll miss you, dumbass. But I'm really glad you made it outta the war."

Now he had a shot at the life — at the future — that should've been his. With his folks, with Becca, with his own family. And she hoped she could give that to her Bucky too, even if it would have to look different. They both deserved as much.

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How long Steph held on to Bucky while she cried, she had no idea. He didn't make a move to pull away, so she stayed for as long as he allowed it. She apologized, and she told him how mad the younger Bucky had been at her for making the world believe his Steph was dead, and she apologized again. She was incoherent at times, overwhelmed by emotion, but after a while of that she felt as though a great weight had been lifted off her soul.

The guilt was still there though. Now including the guilt over making him feel abandoned. She would just have to learn how to live with that, somehow.

Bucky laughed softly as he lifted Steph again, and even spun in a circle with her, just because. "I'll miss you, too, punk. You'll always be my best friend, it's just gonna look different." Who knows? Maybe his Steph would hang onto that stone or whatever they used to show up there, so they'd be able to check in with the other pair on occasion.

Steph was going to be taken care of, that was what was important to him. She was going to have much better medical care and Bucky couldn't picture a world where a version of himself wouldn't put her above everything else.

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The older Bucky was rubbing circles on Steph's back with his good hand trying his best to soothe her. He hadn't wanted to make her feel worse, but he'd definitely managed to anyway.

But he stood there and let her vent while he held her, listening to everything she said, even when some of it didn't make any sense. Bucky knew she needed to get it out, and he told her again and again that it was okay, he understood. If anyone knew what it felt like to blame himself for things that he logically knew weren't his fault, it was Bucky Barnes, former mind-controlled assassin for several decades.

"Maybe we can send each other letters and photos somehow," Steph mused, hopeful. Time travel had been the stuff of fiction but then it turned out to be possible, so maybe there could be a way to communicate across time and space too? She would be interested in what he was up to, how different their timelines turned out, if he would end up having any kids.

Then she got an idea. "How long are you gonna be here for? You gotta let me sketch you before you go." One last present, in case they wouldn't get the chance to see each other again. "And we gotta go to Coney Island. It's so different now, and so expensive! But we used to spend a lot of time there." And unlike their older counterparts, it hadn't been decades since they'd been there last.

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"Sorry, I've been such an ass," Steph said, finally pulling away to look at Bucky's face. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, but through that she managed a weak smile. "Come on, your turn. Lay it all on me."

She'd gotten her chance to vent, now she was giving him his. She hopefully had a better grip of her emotions than earlier and could avoid having another panic attack.

"Hey, the fact that me and you are both here right now means anything's possible," Bucky said with a grin. After all, they were supposed to be doing their own things back in the 1940s, not standing around a kitchen in the 2020s.

He finally picked his mug back up and took a sip of his hot chocolate, eyes going wide. "Holy shit this is good! You sure it's just that powdery stuff?" And she'd said it was a microwave she heated it in. He'd heard mention of those in one of the tech magazines lying around the office, but those things were brand spankin' new and about as tall as he was, not something small to sit on the counter.

But, after her question, Bucky brought himself back to the present. "I think we're gonna be here a little while," he started, his smile turning just a touch sad. "She wants to be here for the trial, that way she can testify for him. So we should have plenty of time for Coney Island and whatever else you wanna show me. Maybe I'll even let you sketch me."

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Hearing the way Steph poured her heart out about everything somehow mended a lot of the anger in the older Bucky. Actually hearing her reasoning, listening to her explain all the guilt she carried and how she thought things were her fault (even though they weren't) made him understand a lot more of why she made the choice she made. And it wasn't because she thought he was too far gone after all. It all blended together with how much he thought about the younger Steph being exactly who he needed in his life.

But he'd also been listening to the tone of the other two in the kitchen. He hadn't paid attention to the words, but he'd caught the occasional laughs and how light they sounded.

"We've both been through a hell of a lot, Steph," Bucky started, then sighed as he tried to pick his words carefully. "And... I know I shouldn't feel guilty about the things they made me do, like you shouldn't feel guilty about anything else that happened, but I don't know. Maybe we're too bogged down with it? I've always needed you, and I always will, but what if we've both got too much darkness for that?"

He paused again, hearing his own voice, but younger, excitedly say something was good, followed by his girlfriend's laugh. It made the corner of his mouth turn up just slightly. "What if you did the right thing by going back, so we each still ended up with each other, but ones that bring a little more light than dark?"

Steph looked relieved. "Oh, thank God. I've been reading and studying, so I'd know what to say when I would testify as her, but there's so much that happened that I don't really get." She had never been in the Army, never been an Avenger, never fought HYDRA, never been involved in politics and espionage. She was ready to say anything that would help absolve him, but it would've involved a lot of bluffing and lying. "Like this law called the Sokovia Accords was passed to regulate the activities of enhanced individuals, and she refused to comply with the terms, and he got framed for murder while all that was going down so they ended up on the run... and the document is longer than a novel and written by lawyers! I couldn't get past the first page."

Cap would have it all handled though. She'd lived through all that and could give all the information anyone needed. Steph felt a lot better knowing that Bucky hadn't been abandoned, after all.

"Okay, so we'll do Coney Island, then we can shop for whatever you wanna bring back. Oh! Do you wanna watch a movie? There are cinemas with these giant screens now, it feels like you're part of the whole thing." It was basically going back to the places Bucky took her, but she couldn't help but want to share her fascination.

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Steph let out a dark chuckle at the conclusion Bucky came to. "I thought she'd be much better for you," she said sadly. "She's just sickly and insecure, but there's modern medicine to deal with the first one, and, well, if she knows you love her then she has nothing to feel insecure about." A lot of her own insecurities in the past had stemmed from him going on all those dates and seemingly failing to notice her. "She's been spared from the war, the serum, everything. She... she'll love you better than I can. Hell, an hour ago I was having a panic attack and ready to throw myself off a bridge or something."

Her voice was quiet by the end of all that, and she turned away, looking down at her hands as she fidgeted with her ring.

Bucky couldn't help chuckling at Steph's obvious relief. "Yeah, she should have it covered. They've got, what, eighty-something years of history we don't fully know?" Something like that. "I don't know about you, but I don't think I could pull off trying to be him." Really, neither of them could pass for their alternate versions. Steph was tiny, and Bucky had two natural arms.

"You can show me whatever you think it worth seeing," he said with a warm smile. "She's the one with things to do and people to see. She even wants to pass her shield to a friend of hers. I just came along to see you." And the future, but mostly to see his best friend.

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"I'm sure he's gonna be good for you, too," Bucky said with a sigh. "He- Did he even go through the war? He's got two arms, so at least he doesn't have that sort of reminder bolted onto his shoulder." Bucky really liked his new Wakandan arm, it didn't have the same sorts of memories attached that his HYDRA arm had, but just the fact that it was needed in the first place was a reminder of everything he'd been through and everything he lost.

"He probably doesn't always have the worry in the back of his mind that maybe the trigger words aren't gone, or that his memory's gonna slip and he'll forget everything again." Bucky knew that was ridiculous, but he couldn't help it.

Steph giggled. "Yeah, no, you can't. You're too skinny." She wasn't disparaging him though, just amused at herself for how much she ended up liking big, muscled Bucky. It was especially a turn on during sex. All he had to do was pick her up and cover her with his body, or grope her breasts or ass with his large hands, or show her his huge cock. He drove her mad in the best of ways, and she was glad he never minded how weird she got sometimes, like when she would leave scratches on his back or ask to be covered in his cum.

She blushed, realizing she got distracted while having a supposed serious talk with her best friend. She cleared her throat. "Thanks for dropping by, really. It's good to see you and know you're not, you know. A POW or something." Well, that brought her focus back quickly. "Will you be staying here, or are you booked somewhere?" She wasn't really sure what she preferred. On one hand, it might be nice to have them over for a few days, and it might also make it easier for them to prepare for the trial. On the other, well, if they were anything like her and her Bucky... which they were...

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"Oh, he did. I couldn't do anything about him being drafted." In hindsight Steph could've gone back further and infiltrated the Army, but she still couldn't see how she could've gotten to a position where she could influence that. Not in the 1940s. "The war was just over a bit faster." Between her tipping off Peggy and the SSR with HYDRA intel and activity, and her own solo missions on HYDRA bases while Cap and the Howlies were occupied, they were more efficient than she and her team had been in her first rodeo. "Couldn't really stop most things though, only influenced the outcome."

She explained that the 107th was still lost in Azzano, even though she'd tried to haul Bucky out of there before HYDRA could round up the prisoners. The events at the factory still happened, but the rescue took place sooner rather than later since she'd found a way to alert Peggy about it. And he still got blown out the side of the train car; thankfully Peggy had been there to pull him back in, while Steph bulldozed through the HYDRA goons to try to get to Zola first. There had been so many close calls, and only so much she could do while operating from a distance. She got really good with a sniper rifle, at least.

"Zola still got to him, but hopefully it was just the initial dose of his serum or something. He heals fast and his memory's a lot sharper, but so far that's about it." There was an undercurrent of worry in her voice, though. What if it hadn't been enough? What if HYDRA would still get him one day?

Bucky could see when Steph got distracted, and he was pretty sure he knew that look on her face now that he was married to the other Steph. But, he didn't say anything, just perked a brow and chuckled softly as he watched her thoughts wander, then snap back to reality.

"I think we're probably gonna stay somewhere else," Bucky answered, his own cheeks going just a touch pink as he grinned. "We haven't actually been married all that long yet." The trip was multipurpose. Part helping the older Bucky with his trial, part getting to see his best friend, part honeymoon. It was unconventional, but it suited them. "That dumbass in there actually thought I'd just move on after you disappeared."

★☆✪☆★
Bucky nodded along as he listened to how Steph changed things in the other Bucky's timeline. It all made sense, especially the part where more intel would have brought the war to a quicker end. But even though their conversation had been so serious, he could still take a small dig at her. It was like he had to. "So Peggy got the serum? Makes sense why it ended faster. She always had a more level head than you." He meant it in jest, but it was honestly also kinda true.

But then he thought back to his own months after his initial capture, the fear and confusion he felt about not knowing what, exactly, Zola had done to him, but knowing it was something. He couldn't get drunk any more, any injuries he got seemed to clear up in days when they should have taken weeks, how he could calculate his shots so much faster than before, it all scared the hell out of him, and he had his best friend beside him, even if he didn't tell her what was going on. Bucky couldn't help wondering how the other one felt going through all that without her there.

"I doubt they'd be able to get to him again," Bucky said, giving Steph a small smile. "Not with you guys knowing what to look out for."

Steph would've been surprised if she hadn't already had a similar conversation with her Bucky, who had made it very clear that he would rather go through all the shitty things he'd been dealt with in his life than lose her. But then she retorted, "Not our fault some dumbasses kept sending mixed signals," with a grin, just because she could, and, well, she was his best friend. She had to take even a small dig at him. "How would you have felt if we'd dated someone else, huh?"

Her smile softened as he confirmed that he was married to Cap. It was kind of cute, this little honeymoon of theirs through time. "Hope you're going somewhere nice. Maybe somewhere she can wear a bikini. Have you seen her old posters?" Okay, so maybe it had been fanart that she had seen, but it was on the Google so she believed their legitimacy.

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Oh, Steph knew Bucky was teasing, but for old times' sake she playfully punched his flesh arm with a soft laugh. It wasn't anywhere near her younger counterpart's bright laughter, but it was a start.

Then she settled more comfortably on the couch next to him. "Well, she did manage to put down a plane with bombs without going down herself." Howard had fished her out of the Atlantic just fine, and there had been a grand homecoming for Captain Carter and the Howling Commandos across the Allied countries. "And she didn't take shit from you." Him. Whatever. He knew what she meant.

She ran a hand through her hair, then started to pull it up to a ponytail out of habit only to realize she didn't have a hair tie and that she had it all pinned up in some post-WW2 hairstyle. "I don't know, Buck. My luck is shit. I think I got everyone, and I saw to Zola myself, but... what if there were others not even you knew or were in HYDRA's files?" She'd compiled and taken a whole list with her to the past — base locations, personnel, sleeper agents — but she couldn't help worrying she'd done a poor job at cleaning up. "And, honestly... there are still wars coming. I don't know what's gonna change. Him being part of SHIELD's top brass will keep me in the know, but..." She trailed off, biting her lower lip uncertainly.

Bucky laughed a little, finding it easy to joke about how stupid they'd both always been now that all those feelings had been sorted out. "Just like it's not my fault some idiots didn't listen when I said you'd always be my best girl, or that none of those dates mattered any." Bucky had told her things like that many times over the years, always hoping that if she felt the same she'd pick up on it. Apparently they were both morons though. "It woulda sucked watching you with someone else, but I woulda put up with it if it's what I thought you wanted."

He shrugged and took another sip of his hot (warm) chocolate before answering. "I don't know where we're going after this. Sky's kinda the limit since she's got that stone or whatever that can take us anywhere," he said, but his curiosity was piqued at the mention of posters. "There's posters of her? Nah, those didn't happen in my timeline. You got any here I can see?"

★☆✪☆★
Sighing, Bucky gave Steph a tired smile. "I don't know. You know what to watch out for, and you know what to warn him and Peggy about, and he can let you know what's going on in SHIELD. Sounds like you guys probably have that whole angle covered."

When he saw her moving to pull her hair up, Bucky took one of the ties off his metal wrist. He usually had a couple of them stashed there. "Here," he said, offering it to her. "If you want you can take all those pins out and use this."

Steph's eyes lit up at Bucky's (unsurprising) interest in the posters, and she couldn't resist giving him a teasing grin. "Oh, you're gonna love 'em. Gimme a minute."

She slipped off to get her phone, giving her Bucky a wave and a smile as she passed the doorway to the living room. They weren't fighting or arguing or anything, which was a relief. She grabbed the phone from the nightstand on her side of the bed, then on the way back she detoured through the guest room that was now her art room to grab the box where she'd kept Cap's sketchpads and stuff.

Once back in the kitchen — after another passing wave and smile for her boyfriend — she set the box down on the countertop, then fumbled with her phone. She only used few of the apps, as she was still learning. Mostly she just used the messaging app, and the camera, and the default Internet browser. "This is the Google," she said as she showed Bucky the screen. "You just ask a question or name a topic and it'll show you things."

She typed Lady Liberty posters and giggled as she results came up. She handed the phone to him and instructed, "Just tap on the one you want to enlarge— oh, this one's good!"

★☆✪☆★
Steph had to smile. Bucky had always carried spares for her, even before she got the serum, so it wasn't a surprise that he still did, for his Steph. "Thanks," she said, taking the tie and holding on to it with her lips while her hands removed the pins in her hair. Her Bucky liked her 40s hairstyles, but he'd understand if she wanted to let her hair down a little. (It wasn't like she was always dolled up in bed anyway.)

"That's sweet," she remarked suddenly as she noticed one of the new photos in the living room. She picked up the frame after tying her hair and gingerly ran her fingers over the glass. "You look happy. I'm glad."

A small part of her felt the bittersweet ache of not being the one who made him happy, after all the years of wishing to do just that. But that no longer mattered. He was happy, and healing from the looks of it. She couldn't ask for more.

Bucky sipped at his cooling chocolate as he waited for Steph to come back, then gave her his full attention once she did. Setting his mug aside, he leaned over. "Oh, she told me this is some kinda phone," he started, pointing at the little box in her hands. "She's played some music on it for us, and she showed me a bunch of pictures with her friends."

When his friend pulled up the Lady Liberty posters, his eyes went wide for a moment. "Holy cow," he said softly, leaning in to get a better look before selecting one to tap on. It had his wife, dressed in what was apparently her tiny little Lady Liberty costume, sitting on top of an airplane with a leg out for some reason. "So, uh, does the Google tell you where I might be able to go buy one of these?" Because he would absolutely get one and hang it up in their place.

★☆✪☆★
The first time his girlfriend scurried past the living room, Bucky gave her a little wave back. But the second time, his hands were full as he was pulling his own hair back, so he just gave her a grin.

Pulling his hair out of his face was a mistake, though, when the larger version of his girlfriend picked up the photo. Grinning softly, he couldn't help the way his cheeks turned just a touch red. "Yeah, she loves to use the camera app, and likes to take selfies of us," he started, laughing softly. "She made me figure out how to get that one printed out for her. Apparently, leaving it on the phone wasn't good enough."

Steph had been a lot less interested in the Stark Expo back in their day, but maybe it was actually living with such technological advances that made all the difference. She was certainly excited to share with Bucky the wonders of the smartphone, even as her own use was still pretty limited.

"Did she tell you she was friends with the Stark guy's kid?" she asked as they scrolled through all sorts of Lady Liberty images. Some were legitimate WW2 posters, but most were fan recreations that ranged from artful homages to, well, the kind Steph would sketch in her secret art book.

She wasn't surprised by his interest in purchasing some of the posters. "I think so... we can buy everything from the Google now and have them delivered here. I'm gonna have to ask him. Or we can print these out!" She didn't really know the details, but her Bucky managed to print the pictures of them on his phone at her insistence.

"There are also lots of Captain America stuff, if you wanna bring back some." She showed him a bunch of merch, from shirts and hoodies to mugs to little action figures. Cap was one of the most beloved people in the world.

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"Him, too, but with his camera." Steph shook her head a little, though she was smiling. "I guess it helps that they don't see strangers in their reflections."

Their situation was hardly comparable, but they were alike in not wanting to look at the mirror. For so long she couldn't recognize who was staring back at her, then her image became a dreadful reminder of her failures. Her husband, at least, was helping remedy that. It also was helpful, in a way, that because she lived in the 40s now, even with her new body she looked more like her old self, with the hairstyles and clothes and everything. Even her Brooklyn accent had started to crawl back into her voice.

"Sorry we interrupted your evening. I forgot I don't live here anymore." She glanced around wistfully, before her gaze settled on the suitcases. "We brought her stuff, in case she wanted them."

Edited 2026-02-18 09:52 (UTC)

Grinning, Bucky turned his head to look at Steph. "Yeah? You think you might be able to get me one of the one with the airplane so I can take it home with me?" It would drive his wife crazy, but he was her best friend. He was supposed to drive her crazy.

Bucky looked back at the phone to see the Captain America items, perking a brow at them. "Damn. She's really famous here, huh?" he asked, grinning just slightly. In his mind, Steph--both versions of her--deserved all the recognition in the world. "I might want something like that, but I know I need that poster. Maybe just a hat or something, mostly so people don't mix me up with your guy so often." Especially if the man had a trial coming up, last thing Bucky wanted was to be hauled off because of somewhat-mistaken identity.

Maybe he should just walk around in short sleeves while he was there.

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"I don't even remember what that feels like," Bucky said, his tone resigned. While his changes weren't the same as Steph's, he knew what it was like to have part of his body not be his. And for a long time there, nothing about him was his own. He still had moments where he saw the Winter Soldier in the mirror instead of the man he was now.

But those times were slowly becoming less frequent, thankfully.

"Don't be sorry, it's fine," Bucky said with a shake of his head. "We needed to hash things out anyway, didn't we? But I'm sure she'll like her things. You can take whatever back you want."

Sighing, he turned to look at her again. She looked about as tired as he felt. "You two wanna stay here or are you staying somewhere else?"

"Yeah, I'll help you get whatever you want. You said we have time." It would drive Cap crazy, yeah, but if her best friend wanted those stuff then Steph was going to get them for him, dammit.

Speaking of stuff, she grew a bit more serious as she turned her attention to the box she'd brought in. She slowly slid it toward Bucky. "These are her sketchbooks and journals, or at least the ones I found. She's very talented." They might be the same person, but Cap had had years to improve on her craft. Her recent pieces were particularly striking and evocative.

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"N-No, I don't wanna impose," Steph said, shaking her head. Aside from wanting to give them privacy to go about their intimate business, she also wanted to give Bucky room to talk about her with the other Steph. He might still have some misgivings or heartaches he'd rather discuss with his girlfriend than her. "We'll find a hotel. I'm sure there's room somewhere."

Then her expression turned hopeful. "But maybe we can hang out again sometime?" She sounded uncertain, like she was already bracing herself for rejection, which stemmed from the times in their past when he'd inadvertently made her feel spurned. "We also gotta talk about the trial, but outside of that, I mean. I can bring pizza and we can watch a movie?" Then, in her desperation for him to say yes, she added, "She can join us, it's no problem. It's not a date, just friends hanging out."

Bucky looked over at the box of notebooks and sketchbooks Steph had placed on the counter, a soft grin on his face. "Thanks for those," he said as he turned back to her. "I bet she'll appreciate them."

He gestured towards the entryway with one hand, where they left the suitcases. "A lotta what we brought you is your sketchbooks and journals, too, but there's some other stuff in there also." A little bit of clothes, some things they just thought Steph might want, that sort of thing.

★☆✪☆★
"I get it," Bucky said simply, nodding. "But the offer's there if you change your mind, alright?" He got it, though. Especially considering how busy Bucky had been with his girlfriend when the other two showed up.

"I do want to hang out some," he added, that tired grin coming back a little. "Both to talk about trial things and to just... hang out. And from what we've heard from the kitchen, I bet she'd like to spend some more time with him, too."

The mention of her sketchbooks made Steph blush. "Did you look through them?" Her tone wasn't accusatory. It was almost, well, embarrassed. There was at least one sketchpad she didn't want her best friend to see. (But, for the same reason, she wanted her boyfriend to.)

★☆✪☆★
"Thank you." Steph appeared visibly relieved by Bucky's acceptance of her offer. "I could use a drink. Living through all that shit again was... stupid." He said it at the same time as she did, and that drew a weak laugh out of her. "If you're out of the stuff, I'll ring up New Asgard and place an order."

She had a long list of things she had to do while she was back in her time, but certain stuff took precedence. Repairing her relationship with her best friend as much as she could was among her priorities, though she would probably spend her whole life doing that, in the same way she knew she would have to with her husband. She had so much to make up for, after how badly she'd fucked up.

"Let me know when you're free and I'll come by then." She didn't expect them to hang out the next day, as he surely already had plans with his girl. "We'll leave the suitcases too, so she has time to look through them."

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