dysmorphics | open post

"I would draw you in that," Steph teased Bucky with a wink before excusing herself to order some food. She had a list of go-to places, but she wasn't sure if they'd been affected by the chaos that resulted from bringing back half the universe. Reminded of that, she turned on the TV and scanned the news channels while she made her calls, reading the headlines as they scrolled through the screen.

She had her go-to orders too, so it was just twice of that with another supersoldier in the house. It took her four calls to successfully place an order, long enough to have seen the big ticket news items.

"Well, shit." She sat down on the couch for a moment, frowning at the TV as she turned up the volume. As expected, there were reports about the battle (and how they have not yet had an official statement from the Avengers, as Tony was dead and apparently she was missing), but what threw her off was the chaos among the general populace and the government scrambling to respond. The media was calling the return of the Vanished the Blip.

Bucky quickly finished his task before following Steph into the living room and taking a seat beside her on the couch, draping an arm over her shoulders as he did so.

Bucky frowned as he watched the news with her, taking it in as best he could, but he had no context of before. "What was it like when we were gone?" he asked, eyes glued to the tv as he watched the chaos. Apparently, there were already housing disputes, people who remarried and had children, children whose parents had been taken and were suddenly back, all sorts of things. Five years was a long time for most people. "I really haven't stopped to think about it yet."

"Quiet." And New York was never quiet, not even during the days of their youth. "You know I once saw a pod of whales in the Hudson? The water was that clear, with fewer ships and all." The disbelief was still evident in Steph's voice.

She sighed, leaning back and resting her head on Bucky's shoulder. "I went MIA for a while after we... lost." It was still hard to talk about the last five years and the incident that brought it upon them, even if they'd already defeated Thanos and brought everyone back. "Locked myself up here and drunk myself blind. Natasha took over what was left of the Avengers because I wanted nothing to do with it." She chuckled darkly. "Only stopped because I ran out of booze. Thor was drinking New Asgard dry and didn't have any more to spare."

The unspoken question hung in the air: Did you try to kill yourself again? She had admitted attempting that, after all, in '45 — and they had won then. But she continued, "So I thought I'd do something with my life and started a support group, like Sam used to." She sighed again, gesturing vaguely at the TV. "I helped some of those people move on, Buck. Told them we gotta. Told them we gotta try and become whole again, and find purpose."

Then she jumped at the first, impossible chance to bring the Vanished back, because it would bring him back.

"I'm a fucking hypocrite."

Bucky's arm tightened around Steph as he turned his head to press a kiss to her hair. "So what if you were a hypocrite?" he began simply. "You still helped people, sweetheart. Yeah, they're gonna have a little more drama right now, but you think that mom they showed-" he gestured at the news with his free hand "-that got her kids back is gonna be mad you're a hypocrite? Or the people who were gone themselves. You brought half the universe back to life, doll. And I think you woulda still done the same if you had moved on."

Sighing, Bucky let his head rest against hers, no longer paying any attention to the news at all. "Call me selfish, but I'm glad you didn't. Imagine if I had found you on that field, told you I love you, and you were just like, sorry Buck, too late." It would have torn him up if that happened, but he would have understood. He did make her wait a century, after all.

"Can't imagine," said Steph quickly, though that wasn't the point. It was true though. She had loved him for as long as she could remember that she couldn't picture anything else. When she'd first been thawed, she'd had at least two years to move on, but didn't. Then the last five years. She might not have known what to do with herself after the Snap, but she knew she wasn't going to find anyone else.

That said, she shifted to stand. "C'mon. Got something to show you."

She led him to the room that had been kept shut since he arrived with her. "Might be a little dusty," she warned before she twisted the knob and nudged the door open with her hip.

It was a furnished guest room. There was at least a bed, a nightstand, a closet and a chest of drawers. She hesitated for a second, then said, "I was holding on to this space for you, in case you ever wanted to move out of Wakanda. Then you were gone and I just... left it here."

She made her way to the closet and opened it with a quiet laugh. It didn't hold clothes, but a hidden weapons rack. She reached in to pull out the lone weapon in it: a sniper rifle. "Ta-da." They both knew she preferred handguns, as a primarily close combatant, so she clearly didn't get it for herself.

Bucky followed after Steph, proud of himself for only getting momentarily distracted by the way his shirt just barely covered her ass, especially when she bumped the door with her hip, but he was too curious to stay distracted.

As he looked around the bare room, it hit him. She really had been waiting. Not just for the right time to tell him how she felt, or waiting for him to tell her, she'd even been waiting for him to get well enough to just... be nearby. And he had been so close to that point himself before that first battle. His best days were already the ones when she came to visit.

He was about to say something about that when she opened the closet and pulled out a sniper rifle. "You know you don't have to buy me presents to get me to watch your back, right?" he asked, a tiny smirk on his lips as he looked the gun over, then back at her as he set it down, leaning it against the nightstand. Stepping close, he wrapped his arms loosely around her waist. "I'm always gonna watch your back."

The smirk grew a little then, his natural hand moving to give Steph's ass a teasing squeeze. "Even if sometimes it's just me watching your backside."

Normally Steph hated jokes about her ass, but if there was anyone allowed to appreciate it, it was Bucky. Hell, he could objectify her and she would bask in it. So she had no objections whatsoever to his declaration, or to having his hand on her ass.

"But I got you more presents," she pretended to whine, walking them backwards to the closet until she was somewhat leaning on the unopened other door. She rapped her knuckles on the surface. "Not vibranium, but it's reinforced." Then she reached inside to push a button, the top rack folding to reveal a secret compartment. "And I recovered some of your old stuff."

There were some of his journals, some of his gear during his tenure as the Winter Soldier (including those damn exploding disks), a few letters he'd written during the war, and something that looked like a small book wrapped in craft paper. She'd taken them from the HYDRA bases they'd raided (she had a feeling Fury knew but turned a blind eye to it) and stolen the others from the CIA. Long story. Sam and Nat were involved.

"You're gonna have to do more than just watch my backside now," she teased.

Bucky stared wide-eyed at the hidden stash of items in front of him, shocked at everything she was able to get her hands on. He'd thought everything from before, especially from the War, was gone for good. Bypassing the Winter Soldier related items, he reached for the letters he'd written. He looked them over carefully, not opening them, just appreciating they were there.

Finally, he looked back at Steph. "You know, the whole time I was in the war I just wanted to go home to you?" he asked, his voice soft and laced with emotion. "Until you came barging in and pulled me off a table, at least. Then I just wanted to stay with you, wherever you went."

Steph hugged Bucky from behind while he looked over the letters, resting her chin on his shoulder. "And I wanted to be where you were. That was why... the plane..." She'd been ready to join him in death, the one place it seemed they could finally be together. Thankfully, neither of them had been meant for death just yet.

She slowly pulled back after a moment, leaving him to his thoughts while she rummaged through the drawers. No fancy surprises this time, just a change of clothes. "Gonna have to throw these in the wash, it's been a few years." But she'd been ready, once again hoping to bring him home.

It took another five years, but here they were.

Eventually, Bucky placed the letters back on the shelf before turning and crossing the room to Steph, sliding his own arms around her as he pulled her close and pressed a warm kiss to her lips. "I love you, Steph," he said once he broke the kiss. "And I'm gonna marry you, yeah? Legally, not just me thinking of you as my wife. And I'm never gonna lose you again." They had enough separation for several lifetimes. There were entire Shakespearean and Greek tragedies that dealt with less than what the two of them had.

But, as far as Bucky was concerned, that wasn't going to happen again. Not even by another bout of magic. He'd just have to out-stubborn the magic or some shit. He didn't know what he'd do then, but he would just have to figure it out if the time came.

Hopefully, that time would never come, though.

"But I sure hope you don't expect me to sleep in this room."

Edited (of course I noticed a typo as I hit post) 2025-12-07 17:16 (UTC)

Steph laughed. "Of course not. But I expect us to fuck in it." She kissed him again. "Love you, dumbass. Just say the word and I'm using every favor and influence to make things official." She was never the type to use her identity as Captain America to get ahead, but for Bucky, she would do anything.

And technically, since he was Blipped, they might be eligible for whatever help the government extended. Once they decided to do something, anyway. From the news it seemed like those in power were as confused as everyone else. The Avengers might actually need to step forward and put some pressure on the situation. And by that, she meant herself. She was still the leader until she hung up the shield, even if Tony's side of the group had been what the government recognized as legitimate because of the Sokovia Accords.

Reminded of that, Steph cupped Bucky's cheek, serious for a moment. "You know they're gonna put you on trial if you come out of hiding, yeah?" She knew that, and she'd started to prepare for it five years ago. But it was his life, and only he could decide what to do with it. "I could always disappear. I was thinking of leaving the shield with Sam anyway."

"Oh, fucking in here I can do," Bucky chuckled and kissed her again. It would be a long, long time before he got tired of being able to kiss her. If ever. "I love you, too, punk. And I'll make it official anytime you want."

But at the mention of an impending trial, Bucky sighed and let his forehead rest against Steph's, closing his eyes. "Yeah, I know. T'Challa and I talked about it some when I was back in Wakanda. I'd rather face a trial than make you live in hiding, though. It's a shit way to live." He knew Steph had been on the run before, but living that way for years, seemingly with no end in sight? That was different. "Besides, you've got too many people who care about you. So I guess we'll have to get married soon so they can't make you testify against me."

"I'll call my lawyer, then." Steph kissed Bucky again, just because she could. She wasn't going to get tired of that either. "But after we eat. And shower. And fuck a couple of times."

She would have to take care of Avengers business afterward too. If the public needed an official statement, then they were getting a statement. She'd have to be strategic about that though. Probably need to review the provisions of the Accords as well, just to cover their bases. She'd have to call Rhodey too.

For now though, they had time. Even if they didn't, she was going to fucking make time. They earned it. The rest of the world could wait, for once.

"Too bad we can't just say we've always been married. Did you know there's a whole conspiracy theory about that? That we already were married before the war?" She normally avoided looking up stuff about herself on the Internet, but there had been a particular stretch of time after the Snap that she read everything that she could about him, even the weird Internet stuff.

"What does it take to get married anyway? Is that something your lawyer could just do for us?" That'd make things simpler, at least. "But if you want a full wedding instead, I'd do that, too, sweetheart. Anything you want."

Steph really did have a lot of people who cared about her, after all. Tons of friends, and with the losses they'd had recently, she might want to give them something happy. Or she could just want to keep it between the two of them. Bucky would just be happy to marry her.

After all, Bucky didn't have many people. Steph, obviously. Maybe T'Challa and Shuri, depending on how you tilted your head. That was pretty much it.

"I mean, they'd be right if I wasn't such a dumbass," Bucky shrugged. "I've known I wanted to marry you for years before the war. There was no one else for me, and I knew it."

"In New York? We gotta apply and pay for a marriage license, then there's a 24-hour waiting period before we can have a ceremony. We can just grab a witness and do it at the courthouse." Steph had dreamed of a proper wedding when she was younger, but now she just wanted to make things official. Besides, with all the losses, it didn't seem like the right time for a big, fancy wedding — and people would expect Captain America to have a big, fancy wedding. The planning and logistics would be the stuff of nightmares.

"So we'll need a few days. We still gotta get rings, and something to wear." A few days might not be a lot of time, but Bucky was right, they had to get ahead, before they put him on trial. Probably even before her next official public appearance.

Bucky couldn't help smiling. Sounded like she'd already looked into it, after all. And it might not be a big affair, but he was standing there planning his wedding to the love of his life. Who wouldn't smile at that?

"So, you wanna get started tomorrow or the next day?" he asked, more than ready to be legally tied to the woman in his arms. "Clothes and rings shouldn't be that difficult. If we can find places that are open." That part might be the tricky thing. "Actually, should we get rings together or get them for each other?"

Either way, Bucky had an idea. He might be able to convince Shuri to whip him up a vibranium ring.

"I guess we can take a few hours off tomorrow to get started," Steph answered with a genuine hint of reluctance. It wasn't that she didn't want to get married, but it was very nice to stay cooped up in Bucky's arms like this. Of course, it could be argued that they'd have all the time after everything was legalized, so there was that for motivation. "Shit, the paperwork. You don't happen to have an actual passport?" She didn't even know where hers was, or her other IDs for that matter, since she'd been using fake ones up until Thanos rolled in.

His question about rings perked her up though. She had an idea too, which was why she answered, "I think getting them for each other would be really sweet." If he got her a cheap plastic one she'd wear it with pride for as long as it lasted, and the next one after that.

But her? She was gonna use that favor with T'Challa for a vibranium ring. Nothing but the best for her man.

Bucky paused then, frowning a bit. "Uh, I don't think I've had an actual ID since the 40s. I'll get in touch with T'Challa about that. Knowing a king might be useful." So what if he ended up with some kind of Wakandan ID? As long as it was a legal ID it should be good enough. "I'll get it worked out somehow. Nothing's gonna stop me from marrying you."

The thought of the other things brought his smile back to his face, though. "So all we really need is to get an ID for me worked out, some clothes, and some rings." And Bucky's mine was already churning (albeit slowly, since he wasn't the artistic one) about Steph's ring. He would probably end up having to get her a temporary one while Shuri made one for him. If he could talk her into it.

He could probably talk her into it. She would tease him for how much he perked up any time Steph came to visit.

"Good." Steph kissed Bucky again, holding him to that promise that nothing was going to stop them this time. "I'll marry you with a plastic ring if I gotta." The real ones might take a while — she certainly didn't want to pressure T'Challa with her favor, not when he had to be dealing with the aftermath of the battle and the Blip — so she was fine officially tying the knot with a temporary ring. "Just been waiting all my life to be Mrs. James Barnes, you know?"

The universe better not fucking mess things up for them again, or she was using that damn Time Stone. It wouldn't be the first time she'd attempt something reckless and impossible for him. She loved him that much.

"Good to know. Cause I don't exactly have much money to put into a ring for you." The man had been literally living in a hut with some goats before the Blip, after spending years on the run or in cryo. He hadn't had a bank account or ID since the 40s, so he was really banking on being able to convince Shuri to help him out one last time. Then the sad white boy would be out of her hair.

"Oh, I'm pretty sure I know," he kissed her quickly again, just because. "I've been waiting my whole life to make you Mrs. Barnes. It was always either gonna be you, or I was gonna be one of those old guys who never settled down and got married." Those were the only two options Bucky had ever considered. Steph or no one.

"Darling, you can make me a ring out of thread and I'll take it," Steph assured him. "And I've got enough money to start us off. They gave me my backpay, and I've sold some art over the years."

She was being modest. She had a lot of money, mostly from her art, and she hadn't even peddled her war era works, which would've sold for a fortune. She didn't want Bucky to feel emasculated by it, though. As much as she appreciated the leaps society had made in terms of gender equality, they were still products of their time. Hell, deep down she still wanted the traditional dream of marriage, kids, and a picket fence.

At his declaration, she gave him a small, rueful smile. "Me too. And not only because the dating pool for our age group is shit." She laughed. "And the one time I even considered trying to move on, you came back from the dead to stop me from making that stupid decision. So yeah, it's Mrs. Barnes or nothing."

"I wish I had more to offer you, but you might end up with a ring not much better than that." Bucky knew he wasn't exactly a trophy husband. Broke, traumatized, and getting put on trial at some point. But Steph was willing to ignore all that to be with him, and that was all he could really ask for, wasn't?

At least there were one or two good things that came as sort of... side effects of Bucky's final mission? The mission itself was absolutely not good, but it led to his escape. And it kept Steph from starting to see Sam.

"There's one thing I'm sure of, though," Bucky started with a warm smile on his face. "Ma and Becca would both be thrilled that we're getting married. They loved you." His dad, too. In his own way. But his dad was definitely a man of the era, nothing like the caring, attentive ones he'd witnessed since getting free.

"I don't care. I just want you," Steph insisted. To prove her point, she kissed him again, but this time she pushed forward until his back was up against the nearest wall. It felt a little familiar; they had fought years ago, after all. But this time there was no violence, only love and desire.

After a while of some heated kissing, she pulled back to grin at him. "My Ma too. I'm pretty sure she knew." Sarah Rogers had definitely trusted Bucky enough to give him a spare key to their house so he could come over when she worked nights and keep Steph company. Or when Steph was sick. In fact, she'd only raised an eyebrow the first time she caught them in bed together; Steph had been down with a fever and she came home to find Bucky curled around her daughter like an extra blanket. If she ever confronted Bucky about any of it, Steph never found out, nor was their friendship discouraged. "They'd probably be laughing at how long it took us to get here though."

Bucky moaned into the kiss, having absolutely no problem with Steph taking charge and pushing him into the wall. He actually thought it was incredibly hot, which he showed by kissing her back just as deeply, letting his hands wander down to her perfect ass again.

When she broke the kiss, however, he chuckled a bit. "I don't think anyone's taken this long before, sweetheart." They were, after all, over 100 years old, and had known each other since they were kids. Not many people could have taken as long as they did. "I don't know if it makes more or less sense for them to let me crash at your place so often if they knew I was gonna marry you one day." Either they just put a lot of trust in him to not try anything with her, or they just accepted it was inevitable between them.

Though, to be honest, if he'd thought she had feelings for him back then he absolutely would have ended up trying something.

"They were probably counting on it, but we were idiots." And shit happened, which got in the way of everything.

A small smile bloomed on her face then, and she ran her fingertips down his chest. "So... those nights you came over... did you ever...?" Saying things out loud was still something she had to work on, which was a little ironic given her potty mouth and filthy imagination. But she was wondering if he'd ever thought of trying anything. Or if he'd gotten a boner while they'd cuddled. She certainly had her moments, but women had the luxury of being able to hide them. Or at least she did back then. Now there was no way she could hide how her nipples pebbled under his shirt, aroused by him groping her ass, as it was extra obvious now that she had generously-sized breasts.

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