dysmorphics: (✮ 17.)
𝘚𝘵𝘦𝘱𝘩 𝘙𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘴 ([personal profile] dysmorphics) wrote2024-10-19 08:45 pm
hadagreatpast: (pic#18031452)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-21 07:33 pm (UTC)(link)
"I know you would. But we're here now, so none of that trying to change shit when we go on our trip," he started and held her close, eyes closing instead of staring at the ceiling. "Don't want you accidentally changing too much and us not getting here." Would Bucky rather lose his arm, decades of his life, and be tortured than lose Stephanie Rogers? Absolutely. Was that healthy? Probably not.

"Besides, the papers weren't your fault. They didn't need to show me that shit, but they knew we were close. Even if they didn't realize how important you were to me, they knew it'd be an easy way to twist the knife." How could they not? Even before the two of them teamed up with the rest of the Howlies to take out HYDRA bases across Europe, Schmidt and Zola watched Steph make a special point of saving him from that first base. "Now, the plane crash itself? Apparently, that actually was your fault."

Bad joke, Bucky.
hadagreatpast: (pic#18031480)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-21 11:33 pm (UTC)(link)
"Sorry," Bucky said quietly. "That was a stupid thing to joke about."

After that, Bucky also went silent for a few minutes. He just held her, almost convinced he could feel her heart beat where their chests were pressed together as he stared at the ceiling.

"I would have probably done the same thing," he said eventually. "If I had to live in a world knowing you were gone? I don't know what would keep me going." Bucky didn't put her on a pedestal, exactly. He knew she had flaws -- lots of them, that he would let her know about whenever he needed to -- but she was also the most important person in the world to him, and always had been. Ever since they were kids, no one had come before Steph in his mind.
hadagreatpast: (pic#18209078)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-22 07:20 pm (UTC)(link)
The fact that they had both lost each other without ever letting go wasn't lost on Bucky. If he had let go of her, she probably wouldn't have been able to get through to him. Though, the loss did help those assholes break him.

After all, without Steph what reason did he have to keep going?

Bucky hugged her back just as tightly and pressed a kiss to her hair. "Hey, you've got nothing to be sorry about, you hear me? It's probably good for us to talk about these things or something." Distracting himself slightly, Bucky moved his good hand so he could play with the ends of her hair.

"I don't think I ever told you that when I got my draft letter, I seriously thought about grabbing you and running. Taking you to the west coast, or Canada, or somewhere far from New York so I couldn't get shipped out," he admitted. Until those newspapers with Steph splashed across them, that draft letter was the worst piece of paper he had ever seen. "Even wondered how many people I could convince my name was Buck Rogers, like the comic strip, cause I knew it'd be easiest if I tried to go by names that were kinda different, but that I was used to."
hadagreatpast: (pic#18031175)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-23 10:27 pm (UTC)(link)
"You just nailed why I didn't mention not wanting to go," Bucky said with a soft laugh. "The other guys were all for it, but I just wanted to stay home with you. So I waited to get drafted instead of enlisting, then faked it after that." At least after all those years of pretending to be interested in other girls, Bucky had plenty of practice faking things. Maybe he shoulda gone into acting.

"If he got caught, he'd get thrown in jail, though. They'd still end up separated." And then Steph, small and sickly and wonderful, would be stranded somewhere unfamiliar on her own during exceptionally hard times, with no family of her own back home to return to. It was better to at least leave her where his family could try to keep an eye on her for him, wasn't it? Those were the sorts of things that Bucky thought about back then.

Unless it had worked, of course. But there was no way for them to know if it would have or not.
hadagreatpast: (pic#18209076)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-25 12:38 am (UTC)(link)
"Always have been," Bucky said with a quiet chuckle. He'd always been a dumbass, and he'd always been hers. He would do absolutely anything for the woman who was stretched out on top of him and he never wanted to be without her again.

Hell, the only reason he'd opted to stay in Wakanda so long was to make sure he was well enough that he would be safe for her to be around. The peace and quiet were great, and he grew to love those stupid goats, but it was all so maybe one day she would be safe with him. Bucky was well ware that he would never be perfect--the doctors in Wakanda called it PTSD?--but he was a hell of a lot better than he had been before.

"I don't think there's anything you need to forgive yourself for," he told her and let his own eyes slide closed. "But I get it. And I'll be here with you while you work on it, yeah?"
hadagreatpast: (+ grin profile)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-26 09:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Bucky didn't hesitate to kiss Steph back before she got up, then watched her with a small grin on his face as she moved around the room. "You can turn on another movie if you want," he told her simply. "I mean, we can always just ignore it if we decide we want to do something else."

Besides, it wasn't exactly like he had any big plans for the day. Just... spending time with Steph. The next day was when they were supposed to go buy wedding clothes and whatnot. She had a much better grip on modern things, such as movies, technology, and different kinds of activities, than he did anyway.

"I don't care what we do today, dove. Long as it's with you."
hadagreatpast: (+ laughter)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-27 11:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Bucky blinked a bit when Steph told him about the sequel, then reached out and took the case from her, looking it over. "I loved The Hobbit," he said with a smile. He'd read it multiple times after it came out, completely enraptured by the world Tolkien had built. "And this was based on a book? Not just a random movie they made?"

If it was a book, he was going to have to track it down to read for himself. He didn't even know or care what it was about, but it sounded amazing. After a moment, Bucky tossed the case onto the coffee table and rolled onto his side on the couch, a slight look of excitement on his face as he held his arm up, offering the space in front of him so he could hold her while they watched the movie. Because dammit, there was a much higher chance of Bucky actually paying attention to this one.

(Though, what he saw of Treasure Planet had also been very good.)
hadagreatpast: (pic#18044026)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-30 05:47 pm (UTC)(link)
When Steph settled against him on the couch, Bucky pulled the throw blanket off the back to cover the two of them, then wrapped his arm around her middle to hold her close. She was warm against him, but that didn't stop him from getting a chill more easily than he used to. Probably from all his time frozen. And he currently only had his underwear and tank top until they washed those spare clothes Steph had dug out for him.

Besides, curling up under a blanket together just seemed like it would be... comfortable. And didn't the two of them deserve to be comfortable?

The movie was good enough that they were a little while into it before Bucky spoke again. But it really had nothing to do with the movie itself. "I don't know what I'd do without you," he told her, his voice soft.
hadagreatpast: (pic#18044028)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-30 10:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Sighing, Bucky tightened his arms around her. "I can't promise that, Steph," he told her honestly. "I'll try, but I can't promise it'd work." He'd try. Maybe. Probably.

"I guess we'll just have to work to make sure none of that shit happens again. Or we could just retire and stay out of it from now on." He never wanted to be in the fight in the first place, as evidenced by the fact that he was drafted, even though the Smithsonian insisted he enlisted. Instead, Bucky had always just wanted to have a good, peaceful life with his dreamgirl.

But at least now they were engaged, so he was getting closer to that goal.
hadagreatpast: (pic#18209078)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-31 10:58 am (UTC)(link)
"So am I." Bucky felt like he'd been tired for eighty years or more, which he sort of had been. Up until a couple of days ago, he'd felt his best when he was staying in Wakanda, but even there he was tired all the time. And he didn't care who Steph gave the shield to, just that if she retired, he would be going with her. And if she didn't (he really hoped she did, though), he'd still be going with her.

"I don't know. Somewhere with running water. And electricity." Bucky had neither in his shack, and while he adapted, he didn't want to have to live like that forever. "But we've got time to figure it out. We both have loose ends we need to deal with before we can just leave town." And no matter where they went, Steph had friends. Eventually, someone would show up wanting her help, which meant they'd also get Bucky's help. But it would have to be a pretty dire situation for him to not try to talk Steph out of helping. "You have anywhere in mind?"
hadagreatpast: (pic#18031481)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2025-12-31 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
"We could probably take our time checking places out," he started, grinning as he ran a hand up and down the side of her arm. "With the trial and everything resettling, it's not like we know what's going to be going on a year from now anyway."

Bucky chuckled softly as he nuzzled the back of Steph's head with the tip of his nose, his eyes sliding closed. "What, like hint about how much I liked Romania, but don't mention buying a house here?" That would be kinda funny, actually, and he wondered how long they would be able to pull off living under everyone's noses without them noticing. "I honestly don't know where else I'd wanna go. I never really pictured retiring anywhere but Brooklyn when we were kids. Nowhere that gets worse winters than here, though. Not if we can help it, alright?"
hadagreatpast: (pic#18036163)

[personal profile] hadagreatpast 2026-01-01 04:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Bucky smiled softly as he closed his eyes, enjoying just being with Steph. Sure, he was loving the movie and all, it was fantastic, but he didn't mind ignoring it in favor of the amazing woman he had stretched out against him. Besides, they were discussing their future together, and that was what he'd always wanted, wasn't it? A future at Steph's side.

"I remember that house," Bucky said with a chuckle. "Hell, I wonder how many of the houses we used to like are even still standing." So many places he remembered from before were gone in one way or another already. What was there to say that something as simple as houses would still be there? "But... I do like the idea of always coming back here between trips. Keeping Brooklyn our home." Bucky might not have moved there until he was an older kid, but he didn't have any real attachment to Indiana. Brooklyn, on the other hand, was where he met the girl of his dreams. Sure, he could live wherever, but deep down Brooklyn was his home, just like it was hers.
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