"You don't think he ain't pissed or hurt that I left? And that's on top of all the... other things." Steph shouldn't, she really shouldn't, but she leaned in and tentatively rested her head on Bucky's shoulder. "He's already been through so much shit, he doesn't need to deal with mine."
She wanted to be with him more than anything, but she didn't think she deserved to be — for entirely different reasons now than when they were younger. It was stupid, yet it was hard to shake. Grief and guilt probably just worked that way.
"He died, you know. For real. Was gone for five years, until we figured out a way to travel through time and reverse shit. There was this... alien warlord, and he wiped out half the universe. We couldn't defeat him the first time." She closed her eyes. "Bucky was in Wakanda, recovering, and I had to ask him to fight again. I bring him nothing but suffering..."
Bucky was about to snap back at Steph, but when her head came to a rest on his shoulder, he just... didn't. Instead, he let her finish what she was saying and let himself get his thoughts in order.
She had already told him so much about her time, even if it was just in snippets. But it was crazy. He'd have to come up with actual questions for her at some point, but instead of doing it then he decided he just wanted to focus on one thing at a time, and that one thing was that she was clearly hurting.
"You don't really think that him being mad or hurt would make his feelings change, do you?" he asked, voice soft as he squeezed her hand under his. Bucky knew his own feelings were far too deeply ingrained in himself for that to be the case for him, so the other version was probably the same, or similar.
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She wanted to be with him more than anything, but she didn't think she deserved to be — for entirely different reasons now than when they were younger. It was stupid, yet it was hard to shake. Grief and guilt probably just worked that way.
"He died, you know. For real. Was gone for five years, until we figured out a way to travel through time and reverse shit. There was this... alien warlord, and he wiped out half the universe. We couldn't defeat him the first time." She closed her eyes. "Bucky was in Wakanda, recovering, and I had to ask him to fight again. I bring him nothing but suffering..."
no subject
She had already told him so much about her time, even if it was just in snippets. But it was crazy. He'd have to come up with actual questions for her at some point, but instead of doing it then he decided he just wanted to focus on one thing at a time, and that one thing was that she was clearly hurting.
"You don't really think that him being mad or hurt would make his feelings change, do you?" he asked, voice soft as he squeezed her hand under his. Bucky knew his own feelings were far too deeply ingrained in himself for that to be the case for him, so the other version was probably the same, or similar.
no subject